Recovery from Social Anxiety and Related Conditions

Robert F Mullen, PhD

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The distinction between social anxiety and social anxiety disorder is in severity. We are not all affected by the same symptoms or relentlessness. The characteristics and traits are equivalent. These conditions originate homogeneously, their trajectories differentiated by environment, experience, and the diversity of human thought and behavior. While comorbidities dramatically benefit, the recovery methods identified are for social anxiety and social anxiety disorder, and reference to one includes the other.

Are We Repressing, Suppressing, Denying, or Regressing?

This is a pre-edited excerpt from my upcoming book on social anxiety, tentatively titled A TOUGH LOVE AND COMMON SENSE APPROACH to Recovery from Social Anxiety.

Our deeply ingrained negative self-appraisal, provoked by social anxiety, can be emotionally challenging for our minds to manage. To neutralize this, we develop defense mechanisms, unconscious strategies designed to protect us from threats to our emotional well-being.  

We deny, avoid, or compensate rather than identify the problem. We rationalize our thoughts and behaviors, project them onto others, or displace them by kicking the dog.

Defense Mechanisms

When used as temporary safeguards, defense mechanisms provide an escape from situations that conflict with the self-image we create to sustain our mental stability. In fact, without defense mechanisms, we are susceptible to decompensation – a serious condition in which we are unable to cope with stress effectively, leading to a breakdown in our ability to function coherently.

Most defense mechanisms are healthy safeguards when dealing with transient trauma, but psychologically problematic when we persistently use them as strategies to avoid facing reality.  

Recovery involves examining and analyzing how we exploit defense mechanisms to sustain our irrational thoughts and behaviors. By doing so, we become conscious of our escapisms and devise coping mechanisms to counteract them.

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Defense Mechanisms Pervasive to Social Anxiety

To date, psychologists have identified roughly thirty defense mechanisms. This does not include the thirteen cognitive distortions pertinent to our condition, which are for another discussion.

Six defense mechanisms are particularly pertinent to social anxiety: compensation (overachieving to conceal our feelings of inadequacy), denial (refusing to acknowledge a problem), displacement (taking our frustrations out on others), dissociation (mentally distancing ourselves from unmanageable situations), projection (attributing our defects to others), and the associated triad of repression, suppression, and regression.

It’s the last three that we focus on in this writing.

Many confuse repression with regression. Repression is a process where we unknowingly suppress traumatic memories or thoughts that our minds find too challenging to handle. In psychology, repression refers to the process by which we prevent specific thoughts, memories, or feelings from surfacing into conscious awareness.

While repression may shield us from immediate distress, it’s crucial to understand that continuing exposure can lead to enduring psychological issues. These self-concealed memories and emotions, buried in our unconscious, subtly shape our thoughts and actions.

For instance, a repressed memory of a past failure could breed self-doubt in similar situations, or a buried traumatic event might introduce us to specific triggers without our conscious knowledge.

These events can stir up anxiety, stress, and depression, underscoring the profound and potentially long-term implications of repression on our mental health. It’s essential to address these issues to prevent them from developing into enduring psychological problems.

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Suppression

Suppression is a voluntary form of repression. It’s a deliberate choice to subdue painful thoughts and memories to deal with them at a more appropriate time. This conscious control over our thoughts and emotions is a powerful tool in recovery, as it enables us to address and resolve the issues that have been temporarily suppressed.

Suppression and Dissociation

The distinction between suppression and dissociation in recovery is also essential to understand. Suppression is a conscious choice to postpone dealing with specific distressing thoughts and behaviors. Dissociation, as used in recovery, is a deliberate decision to mentally separate ourselves from the symptoms of our condition to address them dispassionately and objectively.

Understanding these nuances can provide a deeper insight into our psychological processes during recovery, making us more knowledgeable and better equipped to handle our emotional issues.

Repression and Denial

Repression is often confused with the defense mechanism, denial, in which we refuse to admit to unacceptable thoughts and behaviors, even with evidence to the contrary. Denial involves a conscious refusal to accept the truth.

For example, a person in denial about their addiction may disacknowledge their problem despite clear evidence. Repression, on the other hand, involves unconscious mental dismissal. It’s like the mind’s way of protecting us from overwhelming trauma by temporarily pushing it out of conscious awareness.

Repression and Regression

We often conflate regression with repression. Regression is reverting to an earlier or less mature stage of psychological development, where we feel safe from emotional conflict. Repression is a psychological attempt to unconsciously forget or block distressing memories, thoughts, or desires.

Both are psychological attempts to unconsciously forget or block distressing memories, thoughts, or desires. However, regression is a more severe psychological issue that requires specialized treatment, something a traditional recovery program does not adequately provide.

How do we identify the defense mechanisms we use to avoid dealing with our enduring or precipitating issues? We want to ask ourselves, are we repressing, suppressing, denying, or deliberately dissociating? The earlier stage of psychosexual development that identifies regression will require more specialized help.

It’s a bit like recognizing a familiar face in a crowd. You may not be able to explain exactly how you know, but you do. Similarly, we learn to recognize our defense mechanisms when we see them in action.

This suggests, correctly, that increased self-awareness is necessary to identify, comprehend, and accept our use of defense mechanisms to avoid facing the true nature of our traumatic thoughts and experiences. It’s important to note that during the recovery process, we learn specific coping skills that help reduce our mental and emotional reliance on defense mechanisms.

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INDIVIDUAL RECOVERY. The symptoms of social anxiety make it challenging for some to participate in a collective workshop. Dr. Mullen works one-on-one with a select group of individuals uneasy in a group setting. ReChanneling offers scholarships to accommodate the costs. What is missed in group activities is provided in our monthly, no-cost Graduate Recovery Group. In this supportive community, graduates interact with others who have completed the program.  Contact ‘rmullenphd@gmail.com’.

Committing to recovery is one of the hardest things you will ever do.
It takes enormous courage and the realization that you are of value,
consequential, and deserving of happiness.